I'm really lonely. Nothing new but the sting of it gets sharper every day. I don't know what to do. My feelings rule over me like a despot. It's become mundane, my daily ache of despair. It's my morning coffee, anger and sadness circling in a cup of "why do I persist?"
I don't have an answer. I don't know why I'm still alive. Sure, I'm afraid of death, but I don't see myself being able to live much longer with this pain for nothing but more pain. Boo hoo. Poor me. Fuck. It's twisted, feeling shame for feeling so awful. It's a demon chasing another demon in a circle..
I'm glad I have you, internet, to talk to. Ha. My one place I feel safe to talk is the one place it matters least.
You can't trust people, practically everyone is a sociopath these days. Nobody gives a shit. If I try to go outside the safety of my tower I'm never not disappointed.. men just want to browbeat or pound thier chest like fucking apes. And women mess with me because they can, it's a game to pass boredom..
I'm alone in this tower I cannot recall building, but I know I must have.. and the tower is poison, toxic.. the longer I'm inside, the less I'll be able to relate to those outside the walls. Another demon chasing demons. A feedback loop of angsty, bad writing.
Ha.
I drew a thing.
